sunshine

so i guess i have to let him go. my plug in baby. u stared at me blankly. and then u left. just like that.but i'll be seeing you again love, i will. i can't let go just yet.

and you, whoever said material things would please me? you just need to be youyouyouyouyou.

and you, i love you ok. and i'm here for you. i'm not leaving, baby.

ok siapa boleh guess aku berbual pasal siapa-siapa, dia menang.

I think about the little things that make life great
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling
This innocence is brilliant
I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect
Please don't go away
I need you now
And I'll hold on to it
Don't you let it pass you by
- Innocence, Avril Lavigne

senyum double punyaaaaaaaaa. :) :)

flame

pretty much sucks that school's in like next week. as much as my head refuse to have this dumbass countdown, i can't run away lah hor? anyways, it's a psychological thing. if i dread it, it'll definitely suck big time. not that now i'm looking forward to it. but seriously, we can't stop this, so girl, stop your whining nonsense :)

so last week was indeed awesome. how about this one? for a start, NIE girls slept a night at JB. ahh niceeeee. the awesome food at night sampai semua terbongkang. the weird sleeping habits, and just weird habits especially with the wax. hehe. best. susah betul nak meet semua sekali. so i guess, this one made up for it. but i demand more. thanks. =)

meeting the cousins tomorrow!yay!and i heard there's a new year plan. waaay cool. =)

kekeks on friday. woah. this i tell u is reunition. it has beeen maha-mega-long that we've seen each other and we better enjoy every single minute making a fool of ourselves. i really really cannot wait (to disturb idah). yaaaaay!! sayang much! =)

then i'm off to egypt on saturday. jumpa fahri lah ni. =)

kalau hari-hari jelak macam mana?notacheapthrill.notacheapthrill.shikin tolong jangan buat perangai.

ok much love.

wedded

one down. gone to the other side. the other side. =)

and yesterday was nice, after a long long long long time. sepuluhjam.sangatsuke.

ok bye.

one more awesome week.

boh-tan-nick garland

tadi best. i suka.

then i realised i've been too happy i forgot my KT love.

KT, i demand you and me time!!

shikin selalu buat andaian eh? :)

exactly how u put it. mintak maaf lah banyak-banyak yer.


I don't care if we don't sleep at all tonight
Let's just just fix this whole thing now
I swear to God we're going to get it right
If you put your weapon down

If you want more love,
Why don't you say so?

~abang John Mayer, heartbreak warfare.

berbual sorang

this torment, did i put you through it?

awak tahu kita tak pening? tak demam? kaki sakit balik la

sekarang aku yang pening. nampak sah kental.

siok.ajer.

siot ah romantic ke ape engkau?

and i'm not reassured, beb.
macam mana ni?
and i'd be lying if i say i didn't anticipate.

dasar!menyamps.

go.

getting a bit too close for comfort when shite happens (yet again) will be aching solo at the losing end. that turned out pretty fine. we'd try two days. without any forms of technocommunication. if Godwilling things turned out superfine and life goes on (i'm sure it will), then we'd cut it. coz goodness, bitterheart it's time to be pragmatic. and restless hands, won't you do something else?

you don't even need to understand this.not even complicated.

and 1st dec lovers, happy birthday =)

purr.

i was sooo fine with you being my bulk. then now i'm thinkin you could just be excess.but i hate it. soo much.

and i hate what i'm doing now too.

hownowmrcuriosity?

november rain

after maybe jungle years, i chatted with radthinkinboy. i said hello. and he said peculiar. i was thinking about you a few minutes ago. so i asked what about. he went weirdthingy. don't ask. it's not flattering. ok of course i'd wanna know right.then he said he saw this girl in shorts in the bus and got reminded of me. and he's like what's that girl up to these days.

girl in shorts. me. radthinkinboy.
hmmmmmmm.

omg random nights. damn awesome.

i hope you dance

they actually took adam brody's pic away coz i was inactive.wth.ok anyways, yesterday marks the end of school for the year. not officially though, still have a couple of meetings next week. but yeah, 0.5 done. 2.5 to go. :)

pretty eventful start. got waaypissed on some days. laughed too much on others. at the end of the day, i chose this path. so i'll live and enjoy every moment of it. even though sometimes it makes me so cranky. one thing i learnt though, if people give you shit, just relax. chill dulu. tak perlu get angry & pekik-pekik. outcome will be worse. and let it out to your friends. don't keep :)

biar orang buat kita lah yer.

so last day of school, we took pics. yang tak datang, too bad.and i cannot believe some of the naughtiest boys in my classes hugged me.yes. naughty boys. hurrrr.

hantus kecik

hantus paling hantu

the best hantus.

sayang.

rocket.

highlight of my rubbish-filled week.

dear yuna, i love you, your tudung, everything about you. hahaha! and i love adil, your drummer. thanks.

dear mocca, i love you people too. you guys sooo did not make me pening.

dear you, i'm leaving.

and hey hey you you, i don't like your girlfriend!

diam seh shikin. but i swear.

bye!

not right

yes, the supposedly indifferent me wrote that yesterday.

now i feel like a total asshole.

right.

d.mo pernah nyanyi life is round. one moment you're down in the dumps, and the next, u cannot stop laughing. wad more when u kept watching taufiq's video with the shakers. Hahaha. that's soo him. and he'll be back! rolling good time coming soon. but bestest part of all, Zah's coming back early december!!! zomg. how amazing the feeling. can't wait to be reunited. and make an ass outta ourselves. and simpanging. and hyperventilating at every single male. haha.

it's not that i'm extremely elated about what has come around but then again, i won't lie lah. it got me sniggering and smiling to myself the whole night. oh let me be miss bitch for once. it's about time this stops isn't it. and it's about time other people have their laughs.yes blind toads, "If someone betrays you once, it’s their fault; if they betray you twice, it’s your fault."-Eleanor Roosevelt, so open your eyes and see what life has in store for you, coz right now, what you're having is prettay rotten.just your dumbluck, foo.get up and walk away.

whatdahype

it's been soo long since i have a proper update i'm really getting so tired of my blog already. sch's oookay i guess. term 4's moving waaay too fast. i'm tired everysingleday and i'm scared of how my kids are gonna fare for their final papers. yikes. fighting!

i recalled someone saying this to me "it's time to make yourself happy". kinda woke me up a bit. but what if you are happy only when people around you are happy? as much as i hate it, i can't just leave people in the lurch. even.if.my.efforts.go.down.the.drain.time.and.time.again. sigh, nak buat apakan?cuma sedih lah kalau di saat engkau diperlukan, aku hampaaaaaa (bak kata akak ziana)

ok malas nak go into detail.what happened yesterday, is, stale news. :)

my whole bunch of lovers, i miss you all. i miss ME time too. boo hoo hoo. :(

ok this is how u shd pose for raye peektures...

macam dah tak kuasa nak jalan lagi. kita meet up dinner ke chilleks je ah geng? heeeeehh.

ok bye. satu hari nanti k. much love.

i cannot wait to scream.

BAHAHA

idiot.

apa khabarnya pujaan hatiku?

kau champion.

great. you shytebrains deserve each other.

thank Almighty.

thanks friends for the news. it's just gawdsmackingawesome to be treated like your disposable undergarments. go bask in your socalledlovefilled life.

memang yang pathetic nyer aku per. sekarang ah. sekarang aku.

oh by the way, bala kau lagi satu sekarang cari aku. turn by turn. hebat.

ok ah. dendam boleh remove. kaki boleh jalan. kita pergi tempat baru.
bye.

siap ah. mummy pukul muka kau sampai pecah.

heh main-main jer. mummy ni tak violent.

chibs

cuba kalau aku takde ke
aku jadi jahat.

untuk romeo

sudah terang lagi bersuluh
kau memang manusia bodoh
abeh aku ni pulak sikit pei bebal
selalu nak layankan kau punya hal ehwal

dah berkali-kali kau mainkan aku
si minah ni pun satu
kesian, kesian ah, kasi chan
kena ultimate bomb, sekarang dah menyesal

takde harapan konon
kau ingat aku nak percaya lagi?
dah berbuih mulut aku dol
nampak gayanya, kau nak kena taik lagi :)

sekarang kau rasa aku patut buat apa?
masih nak tolong? lend a crying shoulder?
dah takde gunanya pun apa aku kata
jadi aku rasa, buat bodoh je lah yer?

ok
aku try ah.
besok.

ni geram ni.
geram.

p.s: sepandai-pandai tupai melompat, akhirnya jatuh je tanah juga. tanah. dah bagus tu jatuh kat tanah.buat lagi ah. aku bilang kau, kau terus jatuh kat taik.yes, shit. try ah.kalau taik aku tanak tolong. memang padan muka.

this is pathetic seh.
really.

to the left, to the left.

wizard

JUNO
You know, I've been thinking. I'm
really sorry I was such a huge bitch
to you. You didn't deserve that. You
never deserve any of the poo I unload
on you.

BLEEKER
You know it's okay.

JUNO
Also, I think I'm in love with you.

BLEEKER
What, you mean as friends?

JUNO
No, for real. I think you are the
coolest person I've ever met. And
you don't even have to try.

BLEEKER
I try really hard, actually...

JUNO
No, you're naturally smart. You always
think of the funniest things to do.
Remember when you passed me that
postcard during Spanish class, and
it was addressed like, "Junebug
MacGuff, Row 4, Third Seat From the
Blackboard"? And it said, "I'm having
fun in Barcelona -- wish you were
here"? That was hilarious.

BLEEKER
I was just bored. I only think school
is awesome like, 80% of the time.

JUNO
Plus, you're the only person who
doesn't stare at my stomach all the
fucking time. You actually look at
my face. And every time I look at
you, the baby starts kicking me super
hard.

BLEEKER
It does?

Juno presses Bleeker's hand against her belly.

BLEEKER
Wizard!

JUNO
I think it's because my heart starts
pounding when I see you.

BLEEKER
Mine too.

JUNO
Basically, I'm completely smitten
with you, and I don't care if I'm
making an ass out of myself right
now, because you've seen me make an
ass out of myself a million times,
and you still want to be my friend.

BLEEKER
Well, yeah. You're the best friend
I've ever had, even when you're being
kind of evil.

JUNO
That's all I need from you. That's
more than I could ever ask for. You're
just golden, dude.

BLEEKER
Can we make out now?

JUNO
Okay.

yer. i just watched juno. loved.it.

wicked. :)

http://www.imsdb.com/scripts/Juno.html

mamamullet

so,
what did you do today?
what did you do to me today?

fine lah. my bad. you win k.
you win.

i miss bali.
i miss carefree.
:(

eightyplusmessagesinaday.silly things.


hari ini kau datang riang... la la la


can't wait for tonight.


woooo!

minah (dah) gumuk.

And love ..
Such a silly game we play
Like a summer's day in May.
What is love, what is love?
I just want it to be love
oooh.. :)

riot oi.

i shan't put the blame on anyone.
but me.
this is my incompetence.
my problem.
i'll work on it.
and it better be soon.
insyaAllah.
come on shikin!!!!

aku punya motivator dah menunjukkan perangai lama. oleh itu, inginku katakan, sukatti ye.
sila hantar email atau sms jika kamu ingin memberikan ku semangat atau kata-kata perangsang setiap kali aku memerlukannya. no macam pahamers allowed.

nak berikan makanan pun aku terima.

terima kasih jelah ye.

a while.

i'm so saddened by the passing of yasmin ahmad. first it was MJ. then now her. 2 extremely talented beings. now gone. their work incomplete.the world mourns and now,begin to appreciate. hopefully there's someone out there able to make movies and adverts just as good as yasmins'. the ones that show real in your face situations albeit attracting controversy, but really pull the heartstrings.al-fateha yasmin ahmad. sepet was awesome :)

life's been good. i am happy. i've no boyfriend. i have fab friends, in singapore and australia HAHA. my family's awesome. i love everyone.

no hot gossips, yet.

and we're doing great babe.
just like this.

and ya. aku memilih.
so?

shhh. hidung bawang jangan cakap.

gasp.

i haven't written in soo long i forgot what's been happening in my life. time's moving waaay too fast lah, seriously. the good being, 3 years boleh habis dengan cepat. hehe. i think i've got a plan in mind on what to do after this. but i'll need to save up. like really save up. and, i'll have to accept the fact that i might not settle down so soon. hurhurhur. but i think i'll be happy. insyaAllah. we'll see how it goes. and the parents too. haha. oh wells. this is THE plan for now. :)

ok so what's up? if you really wanna know, i'm full-fledged already. alhamdulillah.so far so good. adapting, still sane.convo's in 2 days. daymn excited about it. but the mood's gonna fluctuate, coz bestie's leaving the next day. soo happy for you but urgh!maintain k kakaks. haha.

had a blast during the last minute surprise chalet.then ate way too much this week. makan luar here, makan luar there. now my perut like damn sexy ah flabbonch like that. gasak lah eh. can't even be bothered to do crunches or whathaveyousthat'llmakeyouskinnyscrawny.bleargh.

you know i was looking thru old photos. it's funny how events take a turn. like you never knew you'd be close to the people you are with right now. right? what made you choose them anyway? what made you leave the rest? do you still wish for things to happen with someone? do you think you'd be somewhere with someone else?

dulu abang cakap, soal hati ni, susah lah nak cakap. memang betul pun.

ada dia yang nak naik kuda. biarpun lambat, tapi dia sampai in style. tu dia yang kata. kita senyum je kan.

ada dia yang... sigh. so honest. tapi everything he did in the past were just sooooo wrong. but i sooo wanna know more. gatal.

then ada dia yang, bertepuk sebelah tangan. tepuk. tepuk. tepuk.

ok bye.

loved

tangled up

no, it's not that i've fallen for you.

it's just that i'm comfortable.

Dr. Meredith Grey: At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing, where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, is usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to, and once we've chosen those people, we tend to stick close by. No matter how much we hurt them, the people that are still with you at the end of the day - those are the ones worth keeping. And sure, sometimes close can be too close. But sometimes, that invasion of personal space, it can be exactly what you need.

:) me likes grey's quotes. a lot.

balibong

i'm always awed by nature. thus, going to bali really gave me a hakuna matata effect, albeit only for three days. such breathtaking serenity. and of course, the wonderful people. our guide on the second day was beyond nice we were all moved to tears when we parted ways. he's just so sincere and honest, i pray for nothing but the best for him and his family.god bless them.

that's us. we did sweeeeeet for first-timers.

and that's nora. nah, i'm changing my alterego's name. shashabiols?muahahaha. what's a true holiday without a pic by the beach, yes? the sun, sand, sea. perfect. this time round it's even better. i saw both sunrise and sunset. whhhhheeeee.

pics are really not with me. i maha malas nak take pictures. was capturing em in memories (macam paham). but nothing beats the romantic-ness of it all i.e. that dinner by the beach at jimbaran (swooooooooons) and of course feeling on top of the world looking down to gawdawesome indian ocean. cantik sampai tak tahu apa nak cakap.

ok dah. maybe i'll post more. maybe not.

mau rokok kretek?

foolish games

well, excuse me

guess i've mistaken you for somebody else

somebody who gave a damn

somebody more like myself

i had foolish games on repeat mode since i walked out of school, all the way to the bus stop, in the bus and all the way home. awesome song i must admit. jewel is just priceless.

you know how sometimes you get so hooked on something. wasn't "love at first sight" to begin with. but it just grows on you?that's exactly the relationship between me and you. you and you and you. don't bother asking. i might not necessarily be talking about humans. ;P

anyways, holidays are already here for me. dates anyone? hurhurhur. the sucky thing bt being in this line is your working friends are not having their breaks like yours, unless they want to of course. but priority's always given to those with families. so friends, how about building families alreadyyy? ha.

k. i'm sleeping early tonight. waking up late tomorrow. msn's sooo boring. thank god the queen entered for a while HAHA. tabik tantawi wa kasi sama lu. and i kinda miss the daily "so what random thing you did today" question.

so, what random thing did you guys do today?

live.laugh.love. (inspired by ellen)
shikin

gawd you're delusional.

and guess what? i'm unleashing Nora. bye shikin.

macam lama tak dengar kan.

perasaan aku?

happy. i am really,really proud of you.but i'm gonna miss you sooo much. :( boleh nangis sebaldi seh. tahan beb, maintain. esok rabak. confirm.

perasaan aku?

dah tawar hati dah. dah tak kuasa pun nak beri pendapat atau kata-kata semangat. last-last dektu jugak yang kau pilih per. nama dia jugak yang kau sebut-sebut. buang masa aku aje.

perasaan aku?

entah. aku tahu niat kau baik (sebab pernah kena coloured). tapi tak payahlah semasa kau keluar dengan dia pun nak text aku. hairan bin ajaib. kelakar seram pun ada.

perasaan aku?

penat tapi excited. orang kata ghairah ah. part mengajar je. seminggu perhatikan mereka. insyaAllah aku yakin. tentang takde life ke apa semua, tu hal ehwal masing-masing. yang penting, sabar.

and go. lepaskan frust menonggeng kau tu. lepaskan bad stress. pressure tak perlu simpan sorang-sorang. yang rugi pun nanti engkau juga. kalau stress tu ringan-ringankan lah tangan call/sms aku, ajak keluar makan ke. tapi tak semestinya aku layan. mungkin kalau kau nak belanja makan, aku on. ;P

anyways, semalam best. dah lama tak keluar and have sooo much fun. on a wednesday night lagik. terharu tengok keakraban dorang bertiga.walaupun semua dah berpunya. (eh macam ryhme). "members" aku? hah. tak usah lah cakap. buat malu aje.

oklah aku dah penat nak fikirkan apa-apa yang membelenggu fikiran aku ni.

oh lagi satu. aku suka tau budak-budak ni. they're sooo innocent. i mean it's pretty obvious we'll know their names right. like hello, they have name tags. this P-satu boy cakap dengan aku tadi...

him: cikgoo, how you know our names?
me: i have special powers.
him: given to you by..?
me: God.
him: Allah?
me : nods and :)

cute kan? haha.

bye.besok yawn sampai pukul empat. lepas tu shiokalicious.

perasaan kau pula?

shit. i'm so incompetent.

go away

just when i thought i'd be soo ready, mentally prepared for what the next stage in life has to offer for me, i was punched in the guts. mind you, i've gotten over the fact that we have to report starting next week as crappy as that may sound. but now this. seriously. no offence but, oh god.what the fark are you guys doing up there man?

sigh. i can just go on and on and on.

others have it worse so MOVE ON.

p.s:happy birthday sis and cousin!

last, last. fuck ah.

apa hitam, terbang dan patut mati?

i think they'd have to amputate my left leg. if not, my left littlest toe.

damn you stupid flying icky icky thing of a cockroach.

peeple

i am still up at 2.42 am. yippee! i'm gonna read a book next. anyways i can't stop peeing. and i have a full blown tummy oredi. thanks to carbonara. awesomeness. godknows how many plates i had in April. some even after midnight. great shikin. good job. now you panic. ok not really ah. depressed sikit jer.

anyways i love the fact that i'm not schooling tomorrow. can spend the day with ajiqo the nephew.laze around. golek here golek there.make a nuisance of myself. then petang tido. then bangun watch suci, then abang andrin yummylicious after that. crycry watching saerah fuuh! best. i love this kinda life. then bonus kalau money just come in every month, without fail. i wish eh. manalah saudagar aku tu. tak muncul muncul. tengah shapekan goatee ke bang? hurr.

my 10+1 weeks of practicum ended. berhooraylah aku sekarang.
next hurdle: three years babe, 3 years. God give me strength, patience, and lots of ideas. memories. good, bad, funny ones. above all, love eh? next phase in life. again, don't hope too much.

was told about a junior of mine from sec school who passed away last friday. bike accident. i saw his FB and cried reading what his friends wrote abt him. i don't know him and i already felt a loss. imagine what his friends might feel man. and to think a few days before, he wrote that he was actually thinking of selling his bike. innalillah wainnaillahirajiun. Semoga dicucuri rahmat ke atas rohnya. Amin. My AlFateha and doa for you bro. ride and drive safe people.

it's scary isn't it? and he added yes, it is. even scarier when you're not ready for it. in my mind, i was like... there he goes agaaaiinnn, belittling the fact that it's true. it's so damn true. and it's so so scary.

ok i might read. or not. it's three. fiction by the way. "The Inheritance of Loss". pretty apt. lovely phrases. indian author. pandai berbual. pandai belit.biasa jugak.aint a stereotype. daymn true.tak happy duduk atas ah. atas kambing.

ok bye.
how pathetic.why'd i do that for?

are you user-friendly?

felt used? too many times?
then yes, you are.

it's time for payback.
hit em where it hurts.
you soo know their weakest points by now.
hurr.

or wait for karma.
lily allen's smile in the background.

tak faham aku.

randomblings

finally i saw danish with his eyes open just now. babies are so adorable. scared myself shit watching Jangan Tegur. da soundeffects should stoppit. and the rasuk parts are so scary it's awesome. yeah i freaked out. thumbsup to my shayang (pierre) wahahaha. much better than congkak and jpb. much.

then had steamboat with family. lunch at eighteen chefs. fuuh hari ni i think i gained 3 kg. did i tell you briyani ayam zam zam at 9pm yesternight? ok that is 1 kilo added already. then tomorrow, most prolly, pastamania, normal favouritest carbonara with lotsa tobasco sauce damn i'm salivating oredi. again, 1 more kilo. baik.

anyways the "breakup" didn't happen. he said to remember the torturous night he put me thru as "THE NIGHT". suka hati kaulah. sadly, it didn't happen then. but i think we're moving towards it. damnradicalthinking.

ok if a guy tells you where he'll be the next day and what he's gonna do there, he probably wants you to be there as well. if you don't turn up, his life goes on. if you do turn up, he'll be soo surprised to see you there. padahal he's the one who told you where he'd be. ni case dua-dua gatal.really.

where am i getting at? i have no idea. told ya i'm random.

and i'm sexcited as hell waiting for the outcome to all this. u know they say you need a bigger lie to cover the lie u made in the first place. no. this is not it. it doesn't involve lies. it involves you. and just plain nothing.at all. n-o-t-h-i-n-g. i'm taking a backseat watching. been a one(or two) man show all along.lets see how the saga continues.

aaanyways, diyana bte mohamad. (there, i said ur name)

bye!

not twitter twit twit

end of april. can you believe it. haiyo i'm getting old. long weekends and you'd think i'd be out enjoying my night away. hell, I THOUGHT I was gonna be out enjoying my night away. lets just say i'm tired of hoping and expecting already. whatever comes, comes. whatever doesn't, then just f it for a jiffy and move. seriously, life's too short to keep getting disappointed. ohblardyblardy.

anyways, five more working days. as much as i cannot wait for the break, i am really gonna miss them. and the so called break, seriously, excursions,talks,whatnots and such? seriously? wastetime man. but looking forward to the SAF visit though. yippeee abangs abangs!

the body is craving for good gigs.
as of now, looking forward to 26th july. not a gig but it sure as hell will be awesome.if i pergi. hehe.

ok bye.
dah malas.

oh my god
oh my god
oh my god
he's "breaking up" with me.

aku nak muntah

sore throat

ok time check. 1 am. i'm the only one awake in the room. all lights are off, only light coming from my laptop. it's bothering me that i've been hearing cries since five minutes ago. baby's cries.

omg here it is again. louder lagik. ayo. shit.

chill ah people. haziq bam bam's in the house. anak sedare aku ler.

ok bye.

reunited and it feels so good.
ok not reunited.
but it sure as hell feels so good.

bangun jam dua petang esok. best.

sit still

yes, it has been a while. time's moving so fast we really need to sit down and take a breather.it's the weekends people come on.

quite a number of coincidences actually. yup, watching the same movie. then again, who wouldn't watch 17 again? it's awesome. zac's really matured he's more yummeh now. and the lines are Fab i tell you. we literally laughed out LOUD.sweetbabyyesus. then what? i was thinking of what you were thinking. food-wise. gawd i'm hungry. how long was the last one? haha. then it started raining, when we were just talking abt how humid the weather is.sudden downpour. ambik kau ubat. kesejukan pagi-pagi ni. habis tu, same old shit dejavus all over again. kept absorbing it. don't bring up the past can? of course. about you, definitely. though those few minutes were superb. but then eh, it's been happening. far too many times. can't possibly not bring it up. from now, no more. you can. you all cannot.bluek.

break it. the code. break it.

karaoke tadi was stupendouslyawesome. sing-along sessions with oldschool. read: di pintu syurga,top of the world, sekadar di pinggiran. classic.

now mr angelina jolie dah balik ke belum?

one23fourfivesixseveneightninetenth

for one, i'll be more nonchalant and aloof than tuwenty-two.

trust.

three better be kickass.

macam macam hal.

stacks of worksheets plus my very favourite compositions brought home to be marked. 3 more wayangs to do. counting down to freedom. long, long weekend. am i starting anything tonight? no baby, not. at. all.

needless to say, gallagher bros and da band were awesome. what's even better was where we were. muka satu-satu macam siak bila usher suruh move. we just stood rooted, clapped and screamed, while the kaypo usher frantically macam stupid suruh kita get back to our seats. that girl, well, she doesn't know rock. minus points ah sista.

eh nak tahu? got crazy photocopy auntie where i'm working. alkisah, i was asked to print 6 sets of papers for a meeting to be held in minutes. the photocopier within reach, is, as always, having a long queue, so i went to the room downstairs. lo and behold. si menopausy was there. so i asked whether she can help to print 6 copies. mak oi, she made a FACE. yes. A FACE. and you all know, u dont make A FACE to me because that stupid face of yours might just remain that stupid for the rest of your life. ok back to story, after making A FACE to me, she mumbled and blabbered non-stop bout how the machine's for many copies lah nengnongnengnong, which really sounds like brokenenglishbullshit to me, when all u can say nicely, without making a stupid face is "sorry, maybe u can use the machine outside" or some other acceptable excuses because kau punya excuse macam muka kau jugak. anyways, yah me, being me, when she was nagging nonstop kononnya nak marah, aku beliakkan mata, made a face that contains a hell load of minah-tengah-marah-talk and exclaimed out loud, and sumpahdraggy "OOOOOOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY". and went out of the room. bodoh punya gilamenopause.seriously.

that aside, mama is so funny. we were watching cepat tepat, which if i may add, the tembam boy is super cute and kelakar nak cubit-cubit, one question read "tak perlu bayar" and the answer is a word starting with the letter "P".

mama: "PREE".

my mom, da bom meletop kapuiiiihhh!

my love

taken from TB's facebook page

Taufik Batisah Hey music lovers,Hope you had a good holiday and weekend.There's a whole bunch of concerts to catch this month and I did meet some of you at a few of them right? Good to see we share the same musical taste.

hmmmm.

the perasan nak mampos, kuat berangan me will say : ooooooomygodoooomygodoomygod, he's soooo talking about me!!!!

whereas the confident me, will say : confirm. he's talking about me.

;p . ooh comee onnn~ haha

anyways, sleeping to dream, with a smile tonight. minus the indian food crave.

aku menyampah and penat tau. hari-hari the mood fluctuates.

it's like every night, i keep telling myself baaaaabiiii ahhh sekolah again tomorrow.
then in school, i realise it's not so bad after all.

and the same old cycle will continue every morning and night, for godknows how long. tak payah cakap practicum habis ah kan. tu bond nak taruk mana? oh god, help me get through this with ease.

but please don't get me wrong. i love teaching and i love my kids.

still, i don't know why the lack of enthusiasm every night.

merepeknakmampos betolah.

nothing at all

four weeks down people, come on!

my life revolves around school, yep. pretty much so. loong hours in school, thinking of what to do for observations, when to have observations. seriously, it's pretty draining. and having ten observations, plus one by the number two is not a joke lah. penat tau nak fikir. sigh. suck it in. we can do this shawties. heh. :)

other than that, my life is, as boring as yours.

but confessions of a shopaholic is soo good. isla is adorable. and hugh dancy, so delicious. like an older version of brody, adam that is. thus, might just be twice as yummeh. those curls.cutenyer.xoxo. ada abang melayu gituk tak? yang reliable punyer. but don't want sidecurls then middle botak.

don't mind me. hormones. and don't get me started on kris, adam and matt. rawr.

seronok lah tu

let me tell you, my perangai is very disgusting ok. yes it is the one week break, thank god. and yes i am having the time of my life just rotting, keluar kecoh-kecoh and rot again. ada niat nak buat kerja tak? soo tidak. macam mana eh? it's not that i have nothing to do. actually i have like a lot a lot of LPs to be done (unlike dore, so babi! haha), then resources too, not like my bahan-bahan are worthy of being awed at, seriously, aku buat apa yang patut jer yer, and don't even get me started on how 'detailed' my LPs are. then there's the essay to be done. like come freaking on that's the last last thing on my mind.

i so so feeel like tanning at sentosa. the beautiful mr sun, the gorgeous scenery. ahh the serenity and everything. tapi weather very not on my side. and yah. aku bangun jer pukul brapa.but i feel so carefree. hehe. and life's been good. minus the ache i had a few weeks back haha which was seriously kental on my part (and assholic on yours) butts, all great now. :)

and i have yuna's dan sebenarnya repeatedly playing in my laptop, on my mind, in my sleep. gawd. that girl is emphatically awesome!hoho.

then i got a message from whoever in my dream tt read 'where are you?' got me laughing out loud.

gawd, i'm so lost in my own complicated-sendiri-plus-soo-not-fairytale-like-world, i'm soo pathetic.

stay
keep me awake
keep me amazed
only for today
keep me dazed
my love is yours only

p.s:redlipstickgirls, comeback this sat.tentative but hopefully.

bestnyer kalau aku secun diandra paramitha sastrowardoyo.

st12-jangan pernah berubah

how great is it to be finally waking up at noon, without having a care in the world? heh. ok bedek ah. still got lotsa things to be done. but come freaking on, i need a breather. and loong sleep, retail therapy and meetup with friends are just what i need. :) :) plus a terpekik-terpekau session at home.

so three weeks have passed. alhamdulillah, so far so good. i'm pretty much loving the younger ones, not that i don't love those eleven year olds, it's pretty hard to get them to give me good quality work and, talking sense most of the time. ahh, must crack ze brain for engaging lessons. kinda noticed they like quizzes. we shall see. and many many more observations to go. must remind self not to slack, remember there's sports day, and SA1 revision week, so don't yaya papaya.

you know making my way round school, to classes, going for relief classes and everything, you get to meet soo many different types of kids. my netballers taught me how to play netball. yes can you believe it? still, aku tak faham, though i scored. wow, amazing. satu hari main, satu minggu badan sakit-sakit.

then relief for the big, older ones. it's like you have to put on a stern face, and not to scold them excessively coz they'll just rebutt and everything. then there's this 'couple' plotting against me and talking about me, INFRONT of me. like tolong yer anak-anak. puhlese.aku sabo baru tahu. muahahahas.

then you see a few lovable faces. and you walk around class, seeing this soo well-behaved boy, quiet and doing his work. quite a looker too, only to check out that he's from the orphanage next door. that moment, i nearly shed a tear. sigh, kesian betul. and on the contrary, that boy who's famous for sleeping during lessons, is from the orphanage as well. sigh. sedih betul.

then there's my younger babies, who made me so so so happy that day. thank you. :)

and the bunch of trainees who are just so so funny! (ni plus the seybok teachers haha)

school stuff aside, when u said let go, you really really really have to mean it. so let go, just let go hor.

lets go!

endofterm

i slept so happy i'm still smiling right now.

this week, minus the merepek assignment..well we deserve it. and hell yeah mosaic's free gigs come at the right time.

proper update soon. maybe.

bye!

love,
besar kemungkinan dah tak kisah. :)

like best like that

this week was splendid. i couldn't ask for anything more. alhamdulillah.

the kids made me smile a great lot. no matter how mischievous, they're just so adorable. koochi koochi. and it totally rocked that the environment's good as well. alhamdulillah. :)

what's even more awesome was my date with mr a to z himself. nevermind the fact i was the only crazy girl standing up, screaming, dancing, singing and shouting the whole time in my row. yikes. the feeling was just superb! couldn't ask for more, well, maybe for a pic and a hug, then for absolutely zero, bella luna, wordplay, if it kills me. then perfection. ahhhhhhhhh. still, mraz is love. pure love. like taufik batisah. :) banyak berangan.

other than that, random chats and smses just made u laugh out loud doncha think? here's two, from well 2 of my favourite people..

on msn,
Diy: hari2 aku makan makaroni
shikin: tapi murah best eh
Diy: 1 dls baybeh
Diy: letagedit
shikin: letagedit
Diy: HAHAHA!
Diy: letak begeil
shikin: HAHHAHAHAH
shikin: typo setan seh
Diy: GAGA!
Diy: agaggaga!

ok seriously, what she meant was letak begedel. typobabibesarpunya.

on sms,
zako: dol, i transferred the wedding $ to your account already
shikin: thanks beb. and you meant doll right?
zako:ya. babi doll.

aha.aha.aha. i have funny friends.

and i love em so.

weekends or wad!

friday i'm in love

the moment i saw them, every single depressingshitty feeling just left me. instantly.

I don't care if Monday's blue
Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too
Thursday I don't care about you
It's Friday, I'm in love

we talked and irritate each other just like we used to in school. pretty sucky that time had to pass by soo fast but i'm awaiting next weekend. :)

buck up, work on your weaknesses, have plenty of redbull, vitamins and supplements and no use worrying about mr backstabber. have plenty of fresh, great ideas. just my dumb luck but i'll prove em wrong. and all of us will too. we can do this girls, insyaAllah. for each other ya.

OMGOMGOMGOMG

i cannot believe i am freaking out. i have no idea why. it's like having lots of extreme emotions all in one i just want to bawl my eyes out and scream out loud. though i have to admit the spa session just now was, seriously, semi-orgasmic (sedap nak mampos), i could only forget for like an hour? then it's back to reality.

yes. one more day till the 10, by right, 11 weeks of fakeshit. i don't want it to start. it's weird the aloof, uninterested and obviously unfeeling me is pressurized right now. hopefully, that's as far as it can go, just up till...now. i don't wanna live the 10 weeks feeling like shit everysingle day. oh god please save this dear scared soul of mine. and those of my friends too.

and then there's you.
wads up with the hot and cold behaviour ey?
macam dah penat aku nak layan.

oh god. dah lah 3 weeks late. it's getting prettay annoying. zits popping out already. emotions macam tunggang terbalik. perangai macam setan. membebel membebel membebel. i dislike girls who are too dependent on men. membebel. membebel. i cannot fake a smile and act interested everyday. membebel. membebel. just what do you want from me? waaaaaddddddddddd?! membebel membebel.

dah puas membebel sendiri, ngantuk.

if i'm crying out,
don't listen to it
it's only my heart.

and then dengar Taufik's Usah lepaskan, nak nangis. urgh. girls and emotions. problem besar punya!!!

ok bye. please pray for me, love, peace and happiness. and yourselves of course.

amin.....i need a hug.pronto. :`(

flowers

you know you've had too much bbq food when..

you dream of someone giving you a bouquet of flowers, only to realise...

it's sticks of fishballs and hotdogs,

wrapped in aluminium foil.

that, my friends, was my dream this afternoon.

how sad is my life that i dreamt of such? but still, i woke up laughing.

life's goood. how's yours?

i.feel.like.shit.

lalalalalalala life

after eons of not taking the train to school, i finally did just now. was bobbing my head to the oldschool songs in my mp3. and managed to get a seat only at Jurong East. seriously, too many people lah. too many cars lah. too many good shows in march lah. think money fall from the sky is it? bodobabi.

took the train home as well. was praying for something to not happen. but alas, it did. i was in the cabin with the red seats. yes. and guess what, there was an empty seat. great spot. THAT dirty spot (ok could be that spot k, wo is just assuming). but i was daymn tired. and i need to take a nap. so, yes, i did it. i sat down on the assumed seat. if only sperms live waaaay longer and is everywhere like bacterias, i might get pregnant seh. zomg come to think of it. there ARE bacterias. fcuking disgusting betol ah. but still, i slept so soundly it was perfect. that's life lah eh. kau geli-geli ke apa, kau tetap kena hidup per? betul tak geng? betol.

ok and Taufiq left us to study in Australia. We girls were really strong till the very last few minutes when we really really started to bid farewell. yes, all of us were crying macam dunnowhat lah. sigh. and i was thinking that was amin and i swear it's hard seh. u see lah life again. sedih ke tidak, happy ke tidak, it will still go on. betul tak geng? betol.

and then u have this procrastinator, who again has shitloads of assignments and what is she doing? chatting, blogging, bloghopping and watching tv. not even giving two hoots or at least trrryyyyiiinnngg to give two hoots about what to write on.

life is such. kau nanti banyak sangat enjoy abeh nangis.

peace. love.joy. food. music. family. friends. :)

i swear there's a crazy shit ass bitch of a mosquito in my house.you'll get your death foe, just watch out.

you know what i feel like doing right now?

to sleep, with a big smile plastered on my face.
and wake up, still with that smile.

btw, the book i'm reading now, is just awesome.

yada yada yada yada yada.

spoiler

they say too many cooks spoil the soup.

i say too much shit makes you a fat boy.

i mean cake. too much cake.and chocolates. and junk food. and macD. oh no i just list out my favourite things.

jom makan secret recipe?

eh too many ideas spoil the piece too. too many and no ideas at all. come to think of it, i'm stuck with my cerpen. essay and laporan? don't even think about it. not moving boy, not moving.

too much love makes you hopeless, no?

too much anger makes you a sore, sore, sore.. makes you sorry. really.

sumpah aku tak faham.

b mcknight in shining armour

yes, aku tak buih diri sendiri hari ni. i went to the library okay. soo refreshing. but kinda shortlived coz for the first time i got pretty disgusted and scared being alone in a public and so mulia place. there was this man who kept looking at me lah. sempat bukak specs lagi seh. and so many times that i got so uneasy, the moment he turned to choose a book, i went out of the place. sick lor. don't taint one of my favourite places okay. and more non-fiction books please?

anyways, the past few days and weeks have been great fun i laughed so much i'm getting a great feeling bout 2009. tapi don't hope so much hor, it's just Jan. who? january lah dey! and march is gonna rock i cannot wait!

oh remind me not to go sentosa on public hols. the last time i went, it's like jampacked with foreigners i felt lost in my own land. those stairs leading to the flower fest looked like great wall of china sia. how to pull a zhangziyi when 1368469 eyes are just everywhere around you right?! sheeshkebab i miss abang kebab betul.

come come take a peek!

this is baby kebab.

baik or what!

menang. hands down. menang.

i tried singing along to b mcknight. to no avail though. must let the man sing alone. too beautiful. but then again, come the concert (yes i'm going with my girls bayybeeeh!), watch out ah b mc. watch out. can't wait!

ok bye!

ps: siapa tu yang berbual pasal orang tu? jangan test-test ok. mari kita tgk siapa yang kena!

jom sayang

i realise there's too many types of people i dislike. those who talk big (yada yada yada), those who lie (seriously dude, what DO you get?), those who take people forgranted (what goes around comes around) and of course those who are just plain rude. technically, there are more characteristics, but it just goes to show how hard it is to please me right? but seriously, do YOU like these kinda people? and it's not as if i hate them or anything. but wait, i do hate being lied to. but i don't think i hate liars. i might disown them though. haha but seriously, it's not easy to please me. just ask... hmmm. nevermind.

eh anyways, what's da commotion with the usage of "awak" and "oklah you" now eh? seems like it's been going on for days in my conversations. no offence to boboy biskot, gegerl lion, cik kak karipap and the likes lah, i'm talking about MY personal life here. tapi kalau with the 'right' people, macam ader cara ahh gitu... nyet!

ok awak kita aside, assignments are OUT. and i'm not even excited to start on em. what is new, seriously?

minah meeting tomorrow. yes!

post berterabuh

you know orang selalu cakap bila umur dah mula meningkat, Tuhan tarik kenikmatan dunia kita bit by bit? i might be experiencing it with the people around me.maybe it's just me but she might be losing her strength and maybe her sense of hearing (or maybe kita berbual perlahan sangat) but i hate myself for failing to understand all these and instead, losing my patience over it. yes, my patience. as simple as this and already i see signs of failure in myself. i never wanted to raise my voice. i never wanted to get pissed off. but it just happened that way. i cannot even control my temper. what the hell sia shikin, seriously.

or maybe i'm just scared. coz i do not want it to happen.

just like how we don't want amin to leave (yerlah kita actually taknak) but it's really happening, in 22 days and life's really gonna sucklahbodo.

and i don't think i'm stupid. aku admit aku lembab, selenge dan blur. tapi aku tak bodoh.

sometimes the last thing you want comes in first

sometimes the first thing you want never comes

but i know that waiting is all you can do

aku nak teh tarik.

i shall wait for teh tarik.

and aku benci nyamuk.

benci.

revolutionofsixtynine

on a roll or what? very bitch or what? melenting macam minah or what?

songs are great. friends is hilarious.
obama is change. change is good.

aqualung is soo soothing it's putting me to sleep.

Seems to me
I'm exactly where i dreamt
I would be
And the view from here is
Something to see
But i need a hand to hold on to
If i fall
Will you catch me
-If I fall, Aqualung

anyways, since we're living in a world filled with different kinds of people, stop being an ass and just tolerate.

bye.
jangan bimbang sayang.

pissed now aye?

oops i did it again. i'm torn between two. so here's the story morning glory (which is a pretty flower btw)

one's new. funny, honest and real all in one. and a looker too, if i may add.

then there's the other one. sticking by me when i'm having the blues. never failing to invoke emotions in me. will leave me thinking for days. and just like the new one, funny, honest and real.

you see. it's the same thing i fall for.
do i need a change or shall i just keep the old?

how?

oklah aku annoying and ngantuk sebenarnya.
i'm referring to private practice and grey's anatomy. back to back on monday nights, yes yes i've said it.

i love them both i refuse to choose :)

get angry with the world. be my guest. it'll only leave u darn tired.
accept. learn to accept.
tolerate. please tolerate.
and stop ur nonsense u izzrayel militants because the poor babies do not deserve all these. their bullies shouldnt be armed with weapons.

peace out.a-town. tet tet tet tet.yeah.

in da club

i've not been reading in quite a while. must rekindle the love.

anyways, read the newpaper today, the article bt that terror suspect (pretty scary i must say) , my gaaaawd that girl can write! she looks familiar too. and her vocab is superb I'd love to read more articles by her. very turn-onnish. i'm so weird, i know.

it's words people. i love beautiful words.

thank god for great beats coz some hip-hop songs, really cannot make it y'all.

You can find me in the club,
bottle full of Bub
Look Mami, I got that X, if you into takin' drugs
I'm into having sex, I ain't into making love
So come give me a hug if you into getting rubbed

do admit boy, tak boleh make it.

no seh.

i have this terrible bugging feeling that .....

i don't know why i always .....

seriously dude, seriously.

12-12.13-12.09.

o my friggin fishball cheeks, i think i'm good luck chuck.
kalau nak sedapkan hati, will get jessica alba soon. hurhurhur.

insecurities aside, zako gave assurance i'll get a mat kay-el.

whatever, okay.

confirm aftereffect of chewy's wedding invitation. my baby's getting married!

and i had a sweet, sweet dream it's so sweet it's never gonna happen.

suka hati lor. briyani ayam zam zam da bomb.

:) ;)

macam nak pergi shopping tapi duit kata no, no no. mother?

bring it on 09

ok so i guess o-nine's taking me on a ride of emotions. only the fifth of jan (weewiit) and i realise i can have so many mixed feelings at one time.

started off with me, as usual restless, in the morning. i am soo not a morning person. wait. not quite a night person too. oh my god, am i even a person? ok diam. totally unmotivated for school, knowing who's gonna take us. surprisingly, the lecture turned out pretty well. yes, i was motivated but am still in denial right now. you get my drift? so am i really motivated to start or not? i heard a silent yes, so insyaAllah. bring it on.

other days, i got so angsty and pissed i swear my zits popped out. now the one on my chin hurts like kena gigit ikan lapar. i got so annoyed i shut off from people. so i thought i'd just shut up and let the angst go before it gets ugly. or i get ugly. for small pathetic reasons. for pathetic reasons that do not need me wasting emotions on. so i chose to feel nothing, not annoyed or angry. just n-o-t-h-i-n-g. i'm good at feeling nothing. yes. so, suck it in.

and did i tell you i got back from sabah receiving great news from phatmily? sexciting i cannot wait.

i chatted with an ex-colleague soon to be colleague again, informing me of news in the school. mixed feelings again. for one, i am thankful i'd be back in a known environment. but then again, you do not know how much i miss my boys. my little ones, how time flies, they're in p3 now can you believe it? and my best class ever? p6!!! oh my god i miss them soooooooooo much it sucks laaaarrr. boleh nangis macam kunyang right now seh. urgh.

best class ever, of course not full force.

my little uns. zicky i miss you!!! and rosyam and raul, aniq, danish! aaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!!

not related but true. i had a long dream about you yesternight. can't quite remember what it was all about. but you were there. my becoming, selfish young man.

would be nice to get back the acknowledgement in real life wouldn't it? macam rindu pun ada.

oh wells.

i think i could just be hooked on private practice. and grey's next.followed by Friends. swell.

in denial dua puluh-empat jam

chew one sorry sorry shot

Sabah was breathtakingawesome. to be honest, i'm not left with much of me bonus in the bank and i'm overloaded with seafood. but was greeted home by mother's sambal sotong. deli or what. and prosperity burger is back. sodaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap sekali.

08 ended with me no longer being a virgin snorkeler.baik shikin!and since i already know how to really use the diving mask, you bet this won't be the last time.and hopefully the lifejacket doesn't suffocate me. HAHAHA. and the fish, kasi chance k. i might be in the wrong (left me feeling pretty bad about it), though the biting sound they made is still vivid in my mind. (obvious exaggeration laaa, but i suuwwwwear.)

champion sho(r)t.

then amazed by dead audience and the fireworks which got us girls all excited one moment and terrified the next. macam jatuh on us. scaareemarreee. but really funny. long live fire!

started off the New Year doing a tribal dance and where adik almost got killed by the tribes. played their games which i really sucked at. i do not even have the power to aim. macam siak. tak boleh diharap betul. kalau aku orang kadazandusun, siang-siang dah mati kena sumpit agaknya. spotted the proboscis monkey which was fun but we got bored after a while haha and saw fireflies in the dark, making the trees look like it's christmas. and the starfilled sky, gorgeous.

macam scary.

si monyet hidung besau.

next day, had a bumpy ride to Mount K. cheh berbual macam mendaki gunung. we went to kinabalu park and tracked up to the canopy walkway i.e. jambatan atas pokok. seriously, what a way to start the new year right? i was obviously captivated by the gorgeous scenery near the Mountain. and when we need to walk up, we were half dead actually. ni lah gara-gara tak exercise langsung. baru 500m and we were complaining already. shame on us. hoho.

tu gunung balu cina aka Mount Kinabalu kat belakang. hitam belegam.

then the real thrill begins. walking on the plank (of course with nets surrounding it). 5 canopies totalling to 500m across, and get this, 40 m high. aku sumpah, if my pessimistic side won, i'd have cried and shivered the whole time. but i was silently motivating myself, and not thinking of the worst. looked down a couple of times, macam nak terkencet pun ada coz you can't even see the ground. kalau jatuh kirakan kau termasuk bawah tanah straight ah. (exaggeration, yet again, i think)

step ada courage. boleh tahan ah.

then berendam in the hot spring. kids boobs sebab macam mandi bathtub with hot water. but what the hell, feels so good after climbing the mountain (stoppit). and van-ed down again this time with heavy rain andrew the closet f1 driver had to slow down (a lil) coz fog was covering his view, and of course ours, as passengers (hey aku tak tido all the time ok). saw 2 accidents along the way. praying like mad silently. and we saw not one, but two rainbows side by side. total beauty!!

on top of that, bargained, ate and laughed a lot. very good holiday. met people from different parts of the world. and sabahans are really wonderful people. awesomeness and really, really pretty memories :)

with tallest

hooookeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

on a less exciting note, school starts in a few hours time. thank god for free friday baby.

much love!